Monday, October 31, 2005

arg.... lesson today.... dunno why.... dun fel lik studying really...... jus wanna faster reach next next yr.... hai yo.... those who read my blogs sure very tired of me saying tis sentence.... dunno whn can i stop saying it and instead, say "yea! today is a great day too! i hav done another mural ! learn another new dance ! played aonther new piano song! and haha had a great tea with glisten inc and frens sia....." jus whn will my blog appear such a paragraph? tis is so impatient...... haix.....
had lesson today stil, whn many sec had holi already..... i was almost late.... as the bus omg man... real slow lor..... is lik omg waited so long whn the bus reached the busstop, is jus nice, 7.45 am.... and whn crossed the traffic, heard the bell reang, i faster run in sia..... thn as runing saw cynthia, haha thn we ran in together...... thn sing the national anthem at the side haha omg first time late ye..... hai yo... thn as waiting for bus ah, haha sms claud.... tell her shit lah haven aboard bus yet.... haha thn ya.....
thn after sch, actually glisten inc go eat lunch in rp kfc de..... but at the end onli me claud.... ya thn zhi hui, yun ting and zi yi.... ya...
thn dunno wat to say liao.... now whole body ache...... cannot tink

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genie_ng out
@ |10:21 PM|
Sunday, October 30, 2005

finally one mor exam over liao..... left one more exam to go...fast fast bah.... cuz... really wanna buck up in studies, do well for the 5 gd subj.... so tat i can go to nafa, with gd grades..... really wanna go nafa as soon as possible.... really.....
　　haix.... stil busy stil busy.... got prefects thingy, got dance exam..... haha used to it liao wors.... whn go nafa le, time will b mor relax liao, can one day do all 4 things.... tat's so great..... and i can imagine, having tea with glisten inc.... and all those bosom frens still..... thn whn my sis reach sec, go music sch liao, and i m stil in nafa, wa.... we can meet everyday to hav tea haha
missed those lunch with glisten inc.... long time no eat lunch together le... all beczuse of me lah... haha.... busy busy... haix.....
　　dunno wat to say le.... i noe i hav lots to say de.... but really ya.... tiring..... gtg
lok forward to yr after next yr...

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genie_ng out
@ |10:30 PM|
Friday, October 28, 2005

i found tat.... my whole life.... i m waiting for sth.... every different time... i m waiting for different things.... tis cycle is getting so sick.... :(
i had waited so long.... and it dun always means tat, tat sth ll come to me.... y m i waiting..... okie gd... now i m waiting to die.... think every human beings are... isn't it? but well.. haix.... die liao oso dunno lll reach wat place.... hai yo... is tis an excuse from me for not wanna to die? haha haix... dunno wat crap i toking le....
today gotten back report bks liao.... and on knowing tat some teachers wun be teaching next yr liao, makes my tears energetic again..... knowing tat today is the last day of sch for many.... lik sec 1 2 and oso mos reluctantly, sec 4 ts...... today is their las day in sch.... as in if they ar not in for any other activities in nvss, they ar from today onwards, out of nv... whn loking at thm, outting up the thousands cranes they folded yest, makes me fel lik crying deeply.... i noe i ll miss thm.... i noe i will...... but well..... next yr... we ar the eldest liao... sec 4 le..... haix.... sec 4 tis word.... seems so near and so far from me.... i dunno why.... but some feeling inside me.... simply makes me fel so......
tmr is piano exam already..... i dunno why i fel so excited and fel so tired on hearing tis.... is lik my mood and emotions, ar sitting in the fence..... dun ask me y... if i noe why... i wun b blogging....
i found me changing... from time to time... lets say... last time... i m quiet lik a mouse..... now... i m lik... a chatterbox.... stil got ppl teling me to kep quiet... wats wrong with me.... i dun understand.... some ppl say... i m getting naughty le..... i fel so sad on hearing tat.... wat makes thm fel so? i m terribly upset on hearing such things into my ear.... once tis hit my ear drum.... i become the old me.... quiet lik mouse..... as if.... isolated from the world... from ppl al around me... i dun quite get it... really..... haix.....
i dunno who i m ... out of the sudden...
i dunno wat i had been loking for... i fel such a fool.... i fel lik... i m not in tis world... i fel transparent from others... as if i m not alive..... i fel lik... ya... i m jus a genie... whn ppl ned me.... they call on me.... whn there is nth there.... i m lik ya... disappeared.... and lik in the bottle... is lik.... i dunno... i dunno why i fel so much of a ya.... dunno why i have so much complains.... i fel my smiles.... all fake.... tis few days..... or recently..... who can brin back my real smile? the smile tat..... is wat a genie is to have on her face? a smile tat... jeanne...... tis gal.... had long lost and mind u... she missed it so camn much.......

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genie_ng out
@ |7:57 PM|
Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Genie under the bottle.... lost in the space.... wanna a corner to hide.... from the harsh reality of the world.....
dunno wat i worrying... i think i m mad..... i can.... tis min, i m happy like crazy, excited bout sth...... another min, i m sad as if end of world lik tat? i dunno wat exactly is my feeling now.... i m lik..... freeze away from my feelings and my moods ar round and round.... not a merry go round but.... thousands and millions of horses, galloping around me in cirlces and cirlcles.....
lots of things to handle, lots of things to settle.... lots of things to think, lots of things to noe..... lots of things to rmb, lots of things to suffered with, lots of things to put aside, lots of things to b invited..... lots of things to.... arg...... lots of things..... :(
it isn't time for me to shed tears..... i hav no right to shed any little drop of tears..... now wat i long for, ar two things..... to go to slp..... and to go to my future..... i rather, i m in a dream now..... pls wake me up..... i m always slping..... but dreams or not dreams, true of false..... i hav no idea if they ar of any..... heavens noes...... but we dun......
whn u ar lost, meaning u ar lost..... there ar things u ned... u ned a compass to direct u..... but y din u think..... where exactly is that compass u loking for..... and how to get it....?
clock and compass.... they ar so so so much a like? did anyone tot bout tat? most of thm.... or rather, originally.... they ar all circular... they both hav " hands" to point a points...... for me..... my time and my directions to go.... they ar mixed.... they ar so very connected.... cun help describing..... yap.....
wat the tarot says.... sound so much of sense..... but whn they ar harsh, they ar harsh..... u never noe......

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genie_ng out
@ |10:53 PM|
Tuesday, October 25, 2005

lost again..... but lik found another direction too....
tis sat is theory exam ready..... tis few days... gonna pin ah...... thn after sat... another big burden dropped.......
well... today cdp lesson... ws again, and my prob again.... cuz it tells us to write down ur future de career.... thn i ask mrs chia.... can write mor than 3? she say sure.... y not? thn tis is wat i wrote.... " murals decoration artist, piano teacher, art teacher/designer, dance teacher, writer...." ha ha tats alot... but ya.... tats me..... yap.....
haix... dunno wat i wanna do sia...... stupid... found myself stupid lik haix.... shit..... haix..... :(
btw... tarot cards... why ar u so sensative! u ar so so u noe? cun help believeing u.... such a gd guidiance, and i m sure to make each of u .... my guardian angels, friens... :)
lots to say no time......

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genie_ng out
@ |10:37 PM|
Sunday, October 23, 2005

haix.... had been really very pissed and stressed..... i noe why but i dunno wat i m doing...really.... i cun find an excuse for myself.... to leave tis world.... which i actually do hav alot.....
i fel lik leaving away al tis things..... they ar.... pulling me to where i hate.... and the time whn i detest...... haix...... tis is the onli words tat can make me mor confy.... haix... haix... haix......
living in the bottle is always a great idea, but it always fail to brin peace to me.... ppl will b knocking on the wall of the bottle.... time will be ticking the cover of the bottle away to get me out of there..... thn the stupid door to my world.... is never had been seen..... even do.... it is in my dream.... and i cun get into my dream as much wasn it.... i ll surely b waken up......
things....ar so so messy once again.... as if i had never ocurs such prob b4 lik tat, which i do!!!
jus lok at my schedule i can c my days... collapsing.... to deep deep down there.... cun help it.... and it is not the end yet..... exams lor... they had gone and left me with those results and two mor exams.... to go.... and i m stress... and i m under pressure which i dunno how many had gone thru b4? i had cca dance, sch prefect piano and dance sch de dance... al crush together....u tell me how can i divide myself and go to all 4 places together.... i m gonna to b lik 5 ma fen shi.... i dunno wat i can do.... lik wat... right hand go sch dance.... one hand go sch prefect.... right leg go dance sch and one leg go piano ah? siao liao lor.... so i m lik.... late for certain thing and left early for certain thing... and even worse late for the same thing and left early for it too..... i gonna smile and tell teacher.... when i m actually crying lik hell inside..... cuz i wanna go there de!!! but is lik everything crush together lik in the traffic junction.... imagine in a cross-traffice, there is 4 ambulance..... on the 4 roads..... is emergency.... with okie let say one was going to giv birth, one is going to die.... one is dun cure will go suicide one is wanna reach there as fast as possible or dead..... thn how? they ride at the same time.... at a cros traffic.... with the same speeding speed..... and the same value...... they ride and thn becuz cross trafic, they crashed onto each other..... thn? die lor.....
leave tis world is so easy, jump down where i m now..... drink any poison thingy....... cut my nerve...... everything as easy as abc.... but why m i stil here..... i.... jus simply dun understand.... wasn't i waiting for sth? i felt so stupid.... to leave tis world....j us becoz of tis period of stress? a long period lah.... gonna bear with these 3 months.... next yr there ar obstacles right ahead too..... tell me how to get rid of thm? well..... haix... dunno...... i m so much of a waiting to get to life after o level onli ah...... so is lik.... my whole life.... will onli b lik calm and smooth traffic after o level mah?
engrossed in my tarot cards..... i infered so much thru it.... but i was so much of an afraid..... to ask bout my future..... wat if the tarot card is " night mare" or sth..... negative.... tell me how to face??? but i had to face it wasn it? but if tis is so... i ll try with al my might.... asking the cards again and again... tilll there is an answer, tat can allow and support me to live on.....
i m stil a genie... but my power was being sucked by al obstacles.... live or leave...... there ar too much ans if i was asked.......

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genie_ng out
@ |11:10 PM|
Friday, October 21, 2005

hav gotten back my eoy results.... and wel.. i cried.... on the day i get my papers back....
tis is so stupid wasn't it... but this is really disaappointing.... i dunno if i m hard wroking in the wrong way, or i din put any effort at al?
i was lik under the bottle.... dun wanna go into the bottle? cuz.... cun face myself.... haix..... the thoughts of retaining.... scare me to death..... wonders and wonders... if i ll reatain.... but whn got back my combine results today, and try adding thm up.... with the mid yr, it is jus so heng heng tat i wun retain.... glisten inc family.... i wanna go up with u al.... dun wanna b alone.....
but anw, if i really get retained... i hav got myelf clear, i wanna go straight to nafa.... dun care.... tat wasn all tat bad..... i can get in thru portfolio interview, and can b of the same batch as my senior..... and do wat i lik and wanted...... haix..... tat was wonderful.... but nth is perfect.....
okie... well... exams ar over and ahead ar more exams.... dance and theory exams.... driving me mad again..... thn nov.... we sec 3s gonna hav lessons, and get prepared for next yr..... tat big thing.... O LEVEL... mr lee said... those who reatain.... enjoy as much as u can during holi.... those who heng heng get up..... mus work hard ah work hard.... well.... hope i really can... ya ... u noe..... do sth to wat i had done and plan sth for wat i shld do?
okie... tmr.... we ar going to do cip.... go to blocks opp of school.... to collect newspapers and things... tat can b recycled... yap.... dunno if it ll b fun not? but sure tired.... and wonder if i can ya.... cuz jus now dance until.... hee hee really very pain.... the muscles and the heel...... yap..... hope it ll b better tmr....

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genie_ng out
@ |11:44 PM|
Tuesday, October 18, 2005

worx..... yest is a fun day..... a tiring day too.....
we glisten inc go outing! hee hee to plaza singapura well.... in the morning i got art exam mah.... thn slp at 23o am mah... so tiring lor.... but hor to think bout hee hee going out with glisten inc family..... al sleepy worms... is out of my way liao le..... whn i recieved tis msg.... " the last person to reach the meeting point will treat everyone pocorns...." wors..... i chiong ah..... cuz i already late by 5 to 10 mins liao...... haha thn i get out le... wa very hapy..... din saw gor yet...... so i chiong to thm...... whn i saw chiong coming in from the main door of compass..... haha thn i say " i first i first" haha thn mel and claud laugh lor.... and say " no lor" haha cuz gor came liao le...... jus tat he go throw rubbish..... haha hai yo..... so in the end we go ps.... i treat thm drinks lah.... ya.... haha pop corn still got buy but everybody pays... haha
welll we reach ps liao.... faster go buy ticket... saw lots of nv de students well yap... expected de lah...... okie thn... hmmm.... buy liao..... decided is watch coupse bride........ yap..... thn i very funy lor..... dunno tat corpse bride is cartoon de..... i tot i real person act de haha ...... welll result, it is nice..... funy scary and yap...... touching lah...
well after buying ticket... got lik 3 hrs to go? cuz is 340 start de..... so we faster go eat lunch... me and claud hungry lik siao lor.... gor and mel lok at us eat again.... thn very funy lah.... we kep sayin bout retribution...haha again.... okie thn while eating mel tak money from me to buy drinks for everyone..... yap..... okie thn after tat... we go zou zou.... yap..... thn go tak neoprint haha mell stil dunn lik taking neopront..... wah lau...t at machine hor.... wah..... siao de lor... haha we pose properly liao... thn suddenly the back ground sheet come down... thn cover the 3 of us lor..... thn got once is pose until very nice liao..... thn the sheet come down we faster get out of it.... thn end up ah..... the neoprint is the 3 of us.... lik clown lik tat lor... all struggling to get out of tat sheet... haha yap..... thn hmm..... very tiring.... go up go down go back go front..... dunno whn the sheet ll come down again... haha ya.... but okie lha..... the neoprints tat we deco and chose is not bad... yap......
okie after neoprint... go eat agin... we go mac...... thn cut the neoprint and divide..... thn eat ice creams.... retribution topic agian haha...... we laugh lik siao ppl lor... everyone loking at us... we still laugh lik hell haha..... heck care lah... happy jiu hao haha :P
thn we go loither loither thn go buy pop corns liao.... thn go in to watch movie le..... yap..... thn wah.... movie end liao... wah wok tat exit wok until lik miles away lik tat........ very long lor.... haha thn well.... ah..... we go to those cute cute shops... those gift shops lah..... haha finally saw sth tat i had been loking for... but no money liao..... is " xing sha" yap.....
thn go back le.... haha in mrt oso laughters al the way..... any moment with glisten inc is laughters lah...... yap..... haha wonder wat ll become to us in the future???

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genie_ng out
@ |5:18 PM|
Friday, October 14, 2005

i m finally back here again..... worx... left one mor paper liao.... art.... haix... today de chem... very cham oso..... dunno lah.... exams ar coming to an end and i think.... i may fail my maths and sciences humanities think can pass.... hopefully wun retain bah...... will drop subj lah... yap..... surely de... haha haix.....
so... now left one more art exam... and tat's it? nono... stil got piano theory exam.... and dance exam..... and lots of schs and des de dance pracs..... dunno wat my feeling was.... now fel very strange.... lik not hapy..... and lik thinking of alot of things.... drizzling somemore, dunno why fel lik crying.... others, ar happily enjoying themselves, as today is their last paper ready.... but i m not sad about me stil got these exams.... i really dunnno wat i m sad about.... :( haix.....
well jus now after sch, i go to check my eye, the doc say ya.... got shrink ready, but not fully cured yet... mon gonna go review again...... yap...... thn... hmm...... tis eye still troubling me.... see things see awhile later ll blur... blink blink okie liao, then blink blink again.... blur even mor... haix..... stupid eyes.... now i really lok very de funy.... with my right eye bigger thn my left eye liao.... before having tis yan zhen, is left eye bigger lor, cuz last time left eye yan zhen mah.... now.... opposite liao..... my eyes... haix... is never going to b equal mah? haix....
gggg.... really dunno why i fel so down now.... fel lik kep typing typing tilll dunno leh........ haix... haix... haix..... now i dunno wat i wan..... and dunno wat i m long for..... jus lik..... brain as if dead lik tat.... ggg.... dunno lah.... okie lah........ dun think liao... go slp....... (-_-)

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genie_ng out
@ |1:18 PM|
Tuesday, October 11, 2005

omg omg omg.... haix.... eye really very pain..... very pain..... haix....
wa haha today 3 am wake up liao..... shuo hao wanna meet in msn with gor by 3 am de... haha abit siao hor, but ya.... really 3 am wake.... to go msn, check the phy eoy prac paper de ans with him.... thn actaully say wanna slp at 5 am thn wake at 6 am de.... at the end....wa.... 3 am till now din rest yet.... as in nap..... now cannot.... later got piano....
wa..... today de phy.... wa... haha dunno lah.... already heck care liao... cuz ya.... dun think i m able to take pure sc liao.... so ya... today de geog okie bah... but some qn really no confidence
yest... haha very ke lian de me... haha chase bus chase liao... on the bus vomitted in my mouth! yucks...... thn swollow back.... OMG..... eeeeeeee haha but really.... wa... very poor thing... cuz tot going to b late liao... whn saw 119 at the traffic light there wah.... jiu start to run..... thn run with the bus somemore..... wah... if is sports day ah.... surely win liao..... cuz really very fast.... but at the end lah..on bus very uncomfortable.... kep lik no breath no breath... thn going to reach sch tat time ne..... wah... ya lor.... tat above mentioned disgusting thingy..... okie thn tat s not the end... emaths.... wah... siao liao.... difficult ah.....! haix.... thn leave blanks again.... then whn brk go revise hist.... haha revise half way suddenly cried.... thn frens around al stunned..... thn very funy at first cry until abit cham.... thn after awhile i m stil crying kep wiping off my tears..... thn kep saying"shit lah.... i dun wanna cry de.... dunno why the tears kep falling" haha thn SiLl crying! but laugh laugh thn sad ..... laugh laugh thn sad... again..... ggg.... haha okie thn hist ne not too bad.... write alot.... dunno got marks mah....... hee hee thn after tat.... yea!!!! happy time!!!!
we glisten inc de me claud and gor go eat lunch together..... claud say c wat i wanna eat lor.... cuz in the mornig vomit mah.... thn i say okie thn eat kopitiam lor... thn they all agree cuz haha we three all bamkrupt liao.... everyone onli got 5 dollar to spend.... thn alot of coins bah.... haha thn whn reach cp de 4th floor haha we saw jacks place haha thn we go c the menu... wah... very happy! hee hee cuz got student set.... $6.50 onli!!!! somemore got my beloved oven baked rice haha wa... really lik c stars lik tat.... thn we check our wallet.... counted all the coins.... thn say yea yea enough enough... thn we go in..... but ned to wait 15 min.... so we loither loither..... thn go to sonare music shop/sch.... haha claud tell me to use tat piano play tong hua.... wa at first tot surely get scolded by the counter tat man.... but results..... he din care us... so i paly lor haha wa... so honoured sia.... haha...
okie finallly 1.30 arrived... haha so we walked into the jack place and fel very odd cuz we ar the youngest customer ye... haha thn we eat and talk... very happy...s ay funy things tell funy jokes.... say lots of things.... and very enjoined... haha billl time arrived soon liao.... thn haha really very funy lor... cuz we all put our notes on the bill tray le ah.... wa not enough...... haha tat waiter wait for us to put alll our coins haha.... enoungh for the pay haha thn gor 10 cent 5 cent all put haha.... then the waiter we can fel tat he is smiling lor..... bleah... haha after tat he count until very cham hee hee.....
thn jus now after geog paper.... we glisten inc.... exclude shi liang, go cp de bk eat hee hee thn chat and laught again..... tok bout where we going to enjoy after eoy.... hee hee
haix... tired..... (-_-) z
z
z

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genie_ng out
@ |3:33 PM|
Thursday, October 06, 2005

wah... finally.... come and write again.... haix... haix.... today de e maths.... omg.... at first wa... do until very happy! tot i m doin well sia... until tat stupid qn!!! thn i m lik stuck at almost all qn.... i m lik lost suddenly, on the same seat in the same rm facing the same paper.... thn tis stupid eye wa.... lik wanna kill me lik tat... haix... kep blur not blur blur not blur..... haix... dunno whn ll heal ne? now is lik got triple eye lids on my right eye lor..... haix....
okie today de ss is okie bah... not sure... write so much also dunno right or wrong...... ggg
okie tmr is cl liao.... tis time cannot learn liao.... cuz the exam format all change liao.... dunno can survive not..... gosh....
okie.... haha after exam jus now very fun! we glisten inc go eat luch together exclude shi liang gor.... well... got me claud melissa and chee meng. all the glisten inc family haha ya...... we go rivervale mall to eat in long john silver.... haha thn wok around rivervale mall longest time in the ntuc haha very fun lah.... we ke jkgjkg..... ya.... hee hee... thn we go mel de hs.... haha i mend her door lock!!! tat time i mend claud de.... tis time mend hers... haha yea.... thn very funy we in her hs listen to her play guitar thn wok around her hs... wa her hs de furniture i luv sia.... thn we very funy really.... sit infron of the tv and guess wat we watch? guess.... " i luv u... u luv me.... we ar happy family.... with a great big hug and a kiss from me to u.... " haha guessed? ya.... burney!!!! so funy lor... cuz mel de hs no scv and thn at tat time 2 pm lik tat... no other programme mah.... thn haha we watch tis lor.... thn hai ya... very funy jiu dui liao :D haha luv to hav time with thm sia.... really..... haha thn we plan after exam go where liao haha faster after exam bah..... but still ah..... wann to b together mus work hard... or else next yr some of us retain jiu haix... sad le .... okie gtg liao bb! :)

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genie_ng out
@ |3:56 PM|
Monday, October 03, 2005

exam started liao le!!! will gone very fast de.... 2 weeks later.... we ar relaxing liao.... waiting for the next big thing, o level...... faster faster! ya...
hmm... raining again now.... ya..... cross hatcing de those rain drops.....
haix.... jus now actually going hougang ave 8 de raffles clinic.... but now thn noe closed liao.... change to eye specialists.... but no open in mon.... and somemore the time is in the morning and at night..... so time very funny..... hmm... okie thn later think going to lim country clinic again..... haix.... okie... hope ll b okie.... or tmr ll hav to one eye go sch.... but mum say onli ned to one day... thn can tak out liao.... haha
hm... today de eng paper.... welll dun really lik the compo's topics.... and the eng compre... rather hard to understand..... ggg dunno lah... okie gtg liao

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genie_ng out
@ |2:08 PM|
Saturday, October 01, 2005

worx.... long time no blog.... haix... tis eye... today even cham.... cover half of my eye.... thn type things kep typo error.... thn arg.... stupid lah.... wonder whn it ll recover.... exam start one day later liao.... dunno wat i had been doing all tis while? lik dreaming al along.... dunno got learn anything....
lots to write but... hmm... no time.... okie gtg.... reallylik having time with glisten inc... jia you everyone :)

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genie_ng out
@ |10:54 PM|